The Intercontinental Hipster Deity, Cheesus, answers a few questions posed by the Las Vegas City Life in regards to the endorsement of lounge sensation Richard Cheese.
Why is it more fun to lounge rather than rage against the machine?
It all comes down to style; whether you have it or not. Lounge is elegance and class, whereas rage reminds me of Our Heavenly Father's biggest faux pas, rap-rock. It's all about unflattering baggy pants and those moronic backwards hats. Remember when the bass player from Rage Against the Machine went wacko during MTV's Video Music Awards a few years back? You would never see someone in a tuxedo avec martini climb a stage scaffolding like that. Now throw in some hookers and blow and that's another story...
How does Dick Cheese manage to swing so righteously?
See above, hookers and blow. Ha, ha, ha, sometimes I slay myself! Actually, Richard Cheese is swank incarnate. He embodies all that is good and pure in the world. He's a real ring-a-ding kid and a musical genius; with the mind of Louis Prima, the heart of Bobby Darin and the singular vision of Sammy Davis, Jr. Of course he couldn't do it without the boys in the band. They are really something, I'll bet any of them could bag a broad like Keely Smith any day, or at least Joey Heatherton.
When will the martini replace beer as the state of Wisconsin's best-selling beverage?
Hello, I'm Cheesus. Who do you think I am, Nostradamus? If I were omniscient don't you think I'd pick the winning ponies? This is a tough question because so much of Wisconsin's livelihood depends on the beer industry; hey, didn't Jeffrey Dahmer work in a brewery? The martini may be chock full of olivey goodness, however I'd prefer they adopt Jack Daniel's. If it was good enough for Frankie, it's good enough for a bunch of cheeseheads.
Read the Las Vegas City Life City Picks story (11-21-2002)
Cheesus gets name dropped in the headline for Las Vegas Weekly column "Vegas Au-Go-Go", profiling endorser Richard Cheese.
Read the Las Vegas Weekly's Vegas Au-Go-Go (11-14-2002)
